Reflections-2019

Warning sign on the Taylor highway during winter, Alaska driving, travel, DM Shepard

It seems like for everyone I talk to, 2019 has been a dumpster fire. I know that I will be happy to see this year in the rearview mirror. For those of you who know me/follow me closely, you know that I have struggled with MS and other health related issues this year. Then in August, the company I worked for announced that they were selling our business unit. These last few months I have spent a lot of time reflecting on my career path and what I want to do going forward.

Me with a frame 5 GE rotor

It surprised a lot of people, given that I’m only 41, that I opted to package out. Instead of applying for a job with the new operator, I requested to be severed. For me, the choice was simple. This is an opportunity to make a deep change in my life. I have explained in my blogs, that I have always enjoyed writing. I enjoy engineering and math just as much. In the last few years, I have felt that my job was taking me down a path that led me away from what I enjoyed doing. I was no longer an engineer, I was pushing paper and collecting a paycheck. Meanwhile my blood pressure was ratcheting up, as I argued against decisions I disagreed with, only to get overridden. The stress seemed to eat away at my very being. The only thing making my job worth doing was supporting the great technicians and operators I work with.

The guys cleaning a substation

I hinted over this weekend of exciting announcements to come. I’m still waiting for my final severance date (I’ll get my letter in the mail Friday—I’ll be sure to let you know). But in the meantime, Ray and I are laying our plans for the future.

Monday Ray and I will be putting the down payment for our first solar kit out at the cabin. We’ll be sharing pictures and posts as we design and install our new solar panels, inverter, charger and batteries. We’re looking forward to the greater flexibility as we stay out at the cabin for longer in the summers and plan out adventures.

The cabin at night.

We also have some major construction projects in the works for the summer of 2020. We poured our foundations this past summer, but in July, we will be erecting a new cook shed and shower/sauna. It feels a little weird, bringing creature comforts to our cabin that has been rustic for so long. But as we transition from city living to Chicken these are changes that will make living off-grid more convenient.

Breaking up the snow for water-I’ll really be looking forward to when we have a better water system!

We also plan on taking a few months and driving the ALCAN (a trip I have never done before). We’re going to do an extended road trip to visit friends in the lower 48. As some of you may have noticed, Ray and I have kind of an obsession with old ghost towns. Expect to see lots of pictures and historical blog posts about our adventures.

The Sternwheel Graveyard, one of our favorite stops on our Dawson City, YT adventure in the summer of 2019

We’re not entirely sure what the long term will bring, but I am excited for this leap. I plan on focusing on my writing in 2020 and hopefully bringing my fiction works one step closer to getting published. I also hope to get my own engineering projects/start-up company off the ground. I’m grateful for this deep-sea change. This is a true, once in a lifetime opportunity, and I look forward to sharing our plans and schemes with those of you who keep following me.

Me out in Chicken taking a break with Jane Friedman’s the Business of Being a Writer

The MonSter and my Anniversary

It is amazing how much of our identity as an adult becomes tied to our careers. I have now been working in the power/energy industry in one way or another for 23 years. I’m currently on hold with the company I work for, our business unit has been sold, and after 13 years, I am about to be severed.

Turbine Rotor

Don’t worry—it’s actually a positive thing. I am looking forward to what will hopefully be a new chapter in my career. A chance to strikfdse out from what I have known and try something completely different. Meanwhile, as I sat down to write this blog post tonight, I looked at today’s date and realized that for the first time in 19 years, my anniversary snuck up on me.

Nope—not that one. My wedding was in June of 2010. I’m talking about a different anniversary. One that I was completely unprepared for at the time.

19 years ago today (December 1, 2000), I walked into a small office in Goose Creek, SC and signed a few pieces of paper, officially ending my Naval Career. This process had been over 8 months in the making. In May of 2000 I received the devastating news confirming that I had Multiple Sclerosis. It’s not that I didn’t know something was wrong. I had been complaining to the medics for at least 2 years at that point. But until I started going blind in my right eye and I lost the feeling in my right arm, I wasn’t taken seriously. I was told many iterations of the following:

  • You’re a hypochondriac
  • You’re imagining things
  • It’s not that bad—tough up
  • All women have problems with their bladders
  • You’re fat—if you just lost a few pounds this would all go away
  • You’re just faking it to get out of work

But once they made an official diagnosis, they streamlined my departure from the Navy. My primary care doctor’s attitude didn’t change—he was still convinced I was “faking it” until the day I walked out the door. Even with positive blood results and active lesions on my brain. Yeah, he was a gem.

But there I was, 22 years old, diagnosed with a chronic illness, and completely cut loose from the path I had been determined to follow. A path I had been assured was guaranteed for 8 years. It was a strange feeling being suddenly adrift.

A few days later I packed up my little red Hyundai Accent and pointed it toward the West Coast. I stayed with my parents for a few weeks, trying to figure out a new life plan. All the problems that I had left behind when I joined the Navy were right there waiting in my old hometown. By January, I had accepted a job in Seattle and once more I hit the road for something new.

They say hindsight is 20-20. I would say it is even more than that. Almost microscopic at times. Freshly diagnosed with MS and still in denial, I wasn’t ready for what lay ahead. If I had it to do over, I probably would have taken more time (even before I got out), to get more help adjusting to my diagnosis. But I didn’t. I didn’t want to acknowledge that there was something really wrong. And certainly the people in my life and the time didn’t care or didn’t know enough to say otherwise.

But as they say:

Alea iacta est

The Die is Cast

I can’t go back and undo the past. But as I look back on what has possibly been one of the roughest years MS-in all of the 19 I’ve been diagnosed (2019 sucked in every way it could), I can hope as I make this newest transition that I am choosing a healthier and wiser future.

I’ll let you all know December 20th what my official fate is. I have some new and exciting plans depending on the outcome.

In the meantime, I will keep posting about Alaska and Chicken. Coming up in December I have a few book reviews in the queue and some additional historical features based on our trip to Dawson City, revolving around my research for my novel, A Drink of Dakrness.

The Hammerstones-Part 1

Tihatnu Pass, dmshepard, Alaska, travel

A blog post about the history of the First People who lived at the mouth of the Klondike (Tr’ondek) before the ’98 Gold Rush.

In my research for my Historical Fiction, A Drink of Darkness, set in Dawson in 1898, I would be remiss in not discussing the Tr’ondek Hwech’in, the First People who dwelled in the area that became Dawson City, Klondike City and Lousetown. There is so much information on this unique group of people, who I do feature in my novel, that I decided to try to do a series of blogs just on the Hwech’in. Here is the first.

Tr’ondek Hwech’in Meaning in Han

Tr’o-Hammer rock used to drive the salmon weir stakes into the mouth of the river

Ndek-“river” part of the word

Hwech’in-People

Put together means loosely “people at the mouth of the Klondike river”

When large deposits of gold were discovered in a small tributary of the Klondike River on August 17, 1896, a veritable stampede ensued.

The Forty-mile Region (for those who follow me, this is where my cabin in Chicken is located), had been actively mined for almost 15 years at this point. Miners rushed from the 40-mile and staked every claim on the “Bonanza and El Dorado” creeks (renamed after the strike).

Discovery claim on what would later be renamed Bonanza Creek

What is often glossed over is that this region was not empty. The Han speaking Athabascan First People who called themselves the Tr’ondek Hwechin (loosely translates to “people at the mouth of the Klondike River”) had been living in this region for centuries. When prospectors began to arrive, they quickly pushed out the First People living at the mouth of the Tr’ondek. This river would come to be called the Klondike, a derivation of the aforementioned Han word.

The rapid influx of people created a forced take over of their ancestral village at the mouth of the river. The Hwech’in had no concept of land ownership or that someone could purchase a piece of land and keep it. The tragic story of a clash of cultures and how they were manipulated out of their rightful land can be read about in my reference by Helen Dobrowolsky below.

Hammerstones, A History of the Tr’ondek Hwech’in. Dobrowolosky, Helene. Tr’ondek Hwech’in, 2014. @heritagetrondek.ca

https://www.yukonbooks.com/shop/customer/product.php?productid=6858&xid=4ad57e222bca0098960948c6f956a6e0

Yukon River, looking north from Midnight Dome

Chief Isaac and other elders foresaw the trouble with disease and alcohol this new wave of people brought and eventually moved the village five miles downstream to another site south of the Moosehide Creek. The new village was renamed Moosehide.

The Yukon River. The Klondike Feeds into the Yukon.

The Hwechin knew about gold—the metal was abundant in the stream beds all around them. According to Dobrowolsky, the children would collect the soft, pretty stones. What can be hard for us to understand is that gold had no value to their way of life. The rivers were abundant with fish, which the Hwech’in had become experts at harvesting from the river. Women spent the short, hot summers gathering the multitude of berries, herbs, mushrooms, bark and other highly nutritious vegetation to sustain them through the winters and ward off diseases like scurvy and rickets. The men hunted large animals like moose, caribou and bear. They utilized the hides for clothing and shelter. Though shiny and pretty as jewelry to us, and useful in many applications, gold is a soft, malleable metal that was mostly useless in their lifestyle.

Gold nugget from Jack Wade Gold Co. Guess how many oz this weighs

The Hwech’in went through a rapid, drastic change in lifestyle as gold fever swept through the region. Their resilience as a people and slow reclamation of their stories and hope is truly inspiring.

Time Management-Goals

gauge, DMShepard.com

I have made many friends through the online writing community who I really cherish. Many of them have provided unique guidance and tips on writing and getting published as I venture into the rough world of writing and querying. One of the things I get complemented on frequently is my seeming ability to “get a lot done.” I thought I return the favor by doing a blog post to share some of the goal setting and time management skills I have learned over the years as a technician and engineer, because they have really carried over to my writing.

Goals

One of the things I notice when I look around our writing community is a lack of solid goals. I see many people setting really vague goals like:

  • I want to write a book
  • I want to get published
  • I want to sell a lot of books

Think that is fantastic, I really do. It is a great first step. One of the things I have learned over the years is the SMART method of goal setting. For those of you who have never heard of it, there are plenty of resources available. I have included a link to one below:

https://corporatefinanceinstitute.com/resources/knowledge/other/smart-goal/

SMART is an acronym standing for:

  • S-Specific
  • M-Measurable
  • A-Achievable
  • R-Realistic
  • T-Timely

A goal of “I want to publish a book” is vague because:

  • It is not specific. What kind of book? Do you plan on writing in more than one genre? Why do you want to write this book (more on this later)
  • It is somewhat measurable, but still lacks definition. Are you content with indie publishing? Do you plan to self-publish? Or is it traditional publishing or nothing for you?
  • Achievability starts to fall apart unless you have defined the first two.
  • I’m about to hit at a sore spot for some in the realism category…many want to be the unicorn, the one that submits their manuscript on the first try and instantly has 3 agents/publishers vying for it. Yes it could happen, but from what I have seen it can be a long, discouraging process that may have NOTHING to do with the quality of your work. Are you ready to pull your manuscript back and edit/shelve it in favor of another project?
  • There is no time bound set on this goal. A better goal would be to state, I plan to have a 1st draft done in X amount of time, and start the querying process by X date, etc.

Motivation

It is difficult to manage your time if you don’t know what goal you are trying to achieve and even more importantly, WHY you are trying to achieve it. When things start to get tough, it is easy to get derailed when you don’t have solid motivation behind your efforts.

Think about your characters in your stories. It is important for the reader to understand their motivations in order to have a great plot that doesn’t seem forced. The same applies to our own lives.

Social Media and Procrastination

This could practically be a blog post all on its own. There are actually many out there, and I constantly see people on Social Media complaining about distractions while they procrastinate.

I really can’t blame them.

We live and work in an era where everything is out to steal your time and attention. In fact, the inventors of social media dedicate segments of their business to try to engage you and keep you glued to your device and constantly coming back for more. Without solid goals in mind, it is easy to fritter away hours mindlessly, and end up with nothing to show for it. I think this is where goal setting comes into play.

See this great article from IEEE Spectrum about the science of attention theft

https://spectrum.ieee.org/consumer-electronics/portable-devices/stop-attention-thief

Personal Goals

I knew once I got my bachelor’s in electrical engineering that I would progress to getting my Professional Engineering License, and then a Master’s Degree. But I did not really have a solid reason why other than the vague, polite answer, “It’s for my professional development.”

I started taking classes through WPI’s online master’s Program. I attended from 2013-2014, then admittedly I stalled out due to both a head injury and frustration. I remember sitting in my office alone at 2 am (my shift started at 6am) staring at a problem I couldn’t figure out, and asking myself:

  • Why was I doing this to myself?
  • What was the point?
  • What was I trying to accomplish here?

I was working long hours, making good money anyway. I had set a goal of getting this degree, but I had no real idea why. I was incredibly unhappy at work to boot. I was rudderless and wanting to quit

Then I came across a great article in 2015. One was an excerpt from a book by Lewis Howes called the School of Greatness. It walked you through an exercise called “The Perfect Day Itinerary.” You write in detail what your perfect day would look like. Then you write up your itinerary for that perfect day. Then you analyze how you would set goals to get to that perfect day. For the sake of brevity, I won’t share my own “perfect day” here, maybe in another blog, but it gave me the ah-ha moment I needed to re-start my classes for my master’s program and get moving again. I could see what I needed to do, and why I needed to do it.

I included a link to Lewis Howes “Perfect Day Itinerary” for those of you who are curious

https://lewishowes.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/06/Perfect-Day-Itinerary-PDI.pdf

Life Purpose

Another great resource was from author/writer/blogger Mark Manson. His article 7 Strange Questions to Help Yourself Find Your Life Purpose

https://markmanson.net/life-purpose

I think my favorite question was #1:

What is your favorite flavor of sh-t sandwich, and does it come with an olive?

Mark Manson-7 Strange Questions to Help You Find Your Life Purpose

And Manson sums it up beautifully. Everything comes with a cost, and nothing is great all the time. As a writer, you’re going to get harsh criticism. You’re going to get piles of rejections. People will troll you just for the fun of it, leaving 1-star reviews even though they never read your book.

The bigger question is what makes your end goal worth it? Is it holding your book in your hand? Is it having your mom gush over the dedication at the front? Is it the awesome review from a stranger that said what you wrote spoke to them?

Then you have found your olive. Enjoy it my friend.

The rest of the questions were equally great, but I will leave it up to you to read the blog. Trust me, it’s worth it.

The Dark Land, horror novella by DM Shepard
The Dark Land, Available on Amazon

Thanks for reading. I’m proud to say my hard work paid off, and my Alaskan horror novella, The Dark Land about legendary creatures stalking the backcountry of Wrangell-St. Elias National Park is available on Amazon. Sign up for my newsletter for sneak peeks at the sequel and other works in progress. I promise I won’t SPAM (even though we do like our SPAM here in Alaska!, #2 consumer after Hawaii).

The legend of the Headless Ravine is steeped in blood. Its hunger for human flesh never sleeps, even in the deepest cold of winter. Courage, skill and love will be pushed to the limits on the isolated, frozen trails as two adventurers travel into The Dark Land seeking answers.

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They Came From the Sea…

gauge, DMShepard.com

….They went to the Stars, my Review of Hanson Oak’s Contribution to the Dark Tides Anthology

https://hansonoak.com/

IN MEMORY OF THOSE WHO MADE THE ULTIMATE SACRIFICE SO OTHERS COULD REACH THE STARS

AD ASTRA PER ASTERA

(A ROUGH ROAD LEADS TO THE STARS)

GOD SPEED THE CREW OF APPOLLO I

Inscription on the plaque in memory of the crew of Apollo I (Gus Grisham, Ed White, Roger B Chaffee)

“Hope is the thing with feathers

 that perches in the soul

And sings the tune without words

And never stops at all.”

-Emily Dickenson

As I read They Came From the Sea, They Went to the Stars, Hanson Oak’s contribution to Gestalt Media’s Dark Tides Anthology, I could see some parallels between his novelette, the Black Hen Witch and this story. The method of approaching the quest for answers between his two stories is philosophically different. I will try to explain (without spoilers). Overall, this story’s haunting themes of love, loss, family and soul mates reminded me of the movie What Dreams May Come (1998) with Robin Williams.

“Abandon all hope, ye who enter here” The first gates of the Inferno- Dante’s Divine Comedy

Hanson draws the reader in immediately with the description of Oliver’s suffering at the loss of his wife and children. Five years after the terrible accident that took their lives, he still haunts the graveyard where they were laid to rest—or so he thought.

Plain cross, person unknown

One night he encounters a beautiful gypsy (she reminds me a lot of his character Corta, from the Black Hen Witch). She tells him she traded them for a second life and convinces him to dig up his wife’s coffin. He does—and realizes the coffin is empty with a door leading out the back. Hanson’s description of the scene as he opens the door into this unknown world to follow his loved ones brought to mind the quote above from Dante’s Divine Comedy.

“But I know, somehow, that only when it is dark enough can you see the stars.”
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Oliver enters a bizarre world reminiscent of a cross between Oz and Wonderland. He has no idea where he needs to go, other than to The Collector of Odd Things, who has his family. The gypsy assured him this was where he needs to be.

One of the interesting aspects of Oliver’s quest to find his family is his need to remove his shoes made of leather. The everchanging path is riddled with thorns “like kitten teeth.” Yet the creatures of the strange land he has entered will not tell him how to get to the Collector of Odd things “carried on death.” The thorns shred his feet to an agonizing, bloody mess, but it is worth it to get to his family.

While it is blood and pain instead of water, his feet, and his soul, are undergoing a cleansing of sorts. The cleansing of the feet goes back to ancient times and referenced multiple times in the Bible and the Quran. It is still practiced today in many eastern religions before important events and holidays. It makes sense in regions where people walk in sandals and bare feet amongst livestock. It is a means to prevent the tracking of dirt and disease into the home.

In Oliver’s situation, he cannot reach the home of the Collector of Odd Things in his old state. He must undergo a cleansing not only of the body, but mind and spirit as well. The physical pain is only one part. Once he removes his shoes and buries them, the creatures tell him the secret to keeping on the path to the home of the Collector of Odd Things. But once more, it is a riddle that Oliver must puzzle for himself.

“To stay on course you must be mindful of the now, but focused on the then.”

Oliver’s quest is introspective. To find the answers he seeks he must look inward. He can’t count on an external savior to just come along and tell him the answer. Every step of the quest will be met with a question or riddle which he must come up with the answer himself.

It is fascinating how much religion comes to play in myths, legends and storytelling of a culture. The style of quest and philosophy portrayed in Hanson’s story is found more often in Greek or Eastern religions where it is common to meet a question with another question. Salvation is never found externally, but through meditation, fasting and guided questioning.

In Western storytelling, often a wiseman (or woman), magical being (God) comes along and reveals the answer to the hero after enough suffering has occurred in the quest. This hearkens back to the differences in the religions themselves. Western Christianity tells you to just believe what is written in the Bible, ask for salvation, and it is given. Islam is more of a hybrid, demanding more fasting and supplication before the answer and salvation is granted. Eastern Christianity (Greek Orthodox, Russian Orthodox, Coptic Christian are some examples) are unique hybrids that draw more on Greek Philosophy and demand introspection for salvation.

No man is an island,
Entire of itself.
Each is a piece of the continent,
A part of the main.
If a clod be washed away by the sea,
Europe is the less.
As well as if a promontory were.
As well as if a manor of thine own
Or of thine friend’s were.
Each man’s death diminishes me,
For I am involved in mankind.
Therefore, send not to know
For whom the bell tolls,
It tolls for thee.-For Whom the Bell Tolls, John Donne

Okay, I had to put this poem in here, because of the scene with the bell outside the door of the house. I really enjoyed the Oliver’s quandary as he debated ringing the bell, and then what happens once it is rung. The reader can feel every moment of this scene. Oliver imagines himself trapped, but he needs only to change his perspective to find his way out.

“We dream to give ourselves hope. To stop dreaming – well, that’s like saying you can never change your fate.”
Amy Tan, The Hundred Secret Senses

In order to be with his family once more, The Collector of Odd things gives him yet another riddle, tell him what the bottle he values contains. The contents are what “drove mankind from the water and took them to the stars.” Once again, the answer cannot be just given, it has to be found. Oliver must set out into the strange world of changing paths to find the answer within himself.

“If she is always changing the path,” Oliver asked. “How can I trust it will lead the right way?”

“The answer is always obscured by questions and not all of them will be your own. If the answer is not in here, then it is out there, and if you don’t know where to look, it doesn’t matter where the trail will lead. You must simply trust it will lead you to right where you need to be, exactly when you need to be there.”

The paths lead him to the very girl who continually changes the paths, The Seeded Girl.

Forever waiting for her parents, she alters the paths hoping they will lead her parents back to her. As he exchanges both questions and answers in her garden, he works his way to his own answer of what lies in the bottle.

“It’s really a wonder that I haven’t dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart.” –Anne Frank, Diary of a Young Girl

I will leave it to the reader to follow through to the end and discover what Oliver decides is in the bottle. As to the answer he gave the Collector of Odd Things, I have given clues with the quotes I have included with my review. In the end, I feel that the answer is actually ambiguous and changes based on each person the Collector of Odd Things gathers to him. To me, there is no right or wrong answer, and the Collector will never complete his collection. I get this impression based on the conversation between Oliver and the Seeded Girl. Just as she will wait forever for parents who aren’t looking, The Collector of Odd things will continue to gather things, creatures and answers until the end of time.

Thanks for reading. My next blog post will be about Bombay Peggy, a unique character of Dawson City. I also plan on doing some posts about our upcoming plans for next summer’s building projects in Chicken.

Review of Bits and Pieces

Psychological Thriller by Dawn Hosmer

https://www.dawnhosmer.com/

Color helps to express light. Not the physical phenomenon, but the only light that really exists, that in the artists brain—Henri Matisse

Our human fascination not only with light, but with color, makes sense at least for those of us who can see. We live in a world centered around vision and the ability to see. At the same time, it is amazing to consider that what we can see with the human eye is only a tiny silver of the full electromagnetic spectrum. The portion that makes up visible light is from 4×10^14 through 8×10^14 Hz (or approx. 380-740 nanometers who to prefer to look at it in wavelengths). It can be broken down into 7 basic waves:

  • Radio
  • Micro
  • Infrared
  • Visible
  • Ultraviolet
  • Xray
  • Gamma

The soul becomes dyed with the color of its thoughts—Marcus Aurelius

Dawn’s book is a fast-paced thriller about Tessa, a young woman with a gift—or a curse, depending on perspective. When she touches someone, she at times absorbs a piece of them in the form of color. Each color has a different meaning. She might take on a memory, emotion, personality trait or talent from the person she touches. In the meantime, she loses a fragment of herself in the process. After so many years, she no longer knows how much of her psyche is herself and how much belongs to people she has contacted along the way.

Estranged from her wealthy family, she lives in the small college town of Chandlersville. Multiple women have gone missing/turned up murdered. Tessa inadvertently touches the murderer in a crowd during a search for the most recent missing girls. In an instant, she takes on the murderer’s desires and proclivities. Now Tessa must find the killer before she loses herself completely

I’ve always been a fast reader, and when I get really into a book, I can polish one off in a couple of hours. I decided to bring Dawn Hosmer’s thriller, Bits and Pieces as a book to read on the plane. I think I set a new record. I started it as the plane pushed back from the gate. I finished it 20 minutes before landing, putting me at about 2 hours and 30 minutes. Yep, I got pretty into it. The downside is that there were some pretty disturbing/triggering scenes. When I get to those in something I am reading or writing, I like to get up and pace. Kind of hard to do on an airplane at 30 K feet with a drink cart in the aisle. I am sure the guy seated next to me thought I was nuts as did most of the flight attendants.

Art is to console those who have been broken by life—Vincent Van Gogh

Dawn uses first person point of view in Bits and Pieces. From a personal perspective I feel this can be difficult to pull off. I have read many books where the author attempts to write in first person only to botch it by telling me things the character couldn’t know unless they were psychic or by dropping out of first person. Dawn pulls it off seamlessly. She embeds the reader fully into the mind of Tess. In the process she creates a relatable and believable young woman who is struggling with not only this strange gift she has been given, but her place in society. She sees herself as a freak, who doesn’t dare touch someone for fear of losing a piece of herself (she almost reminds me of Rogue from the X-Men).

One of the fascinating aspects of Dawn’s book is Tessa’s use of art to deal with her gift and with the struggles it brings. It is well documented that art is a therapeutic tool. I know for myself, my writing is a means of expressing things I cannot say out loud.

Tessa paints the things that she “sees” at the urging of her therapist. As she devolves into the mind of the killer, she paints the women he has killed in great detail. This was one of the most disturbing yet exquisite parts to read. I would love for Dawn to hold a painting themed night based on this scene where we could get together and everyone paint what we think these pictures should look like. (Maybe this is something we can suggest to Gestalt Media, Dawn?)

Dawn also pulls off some unique twists at the end that will have the reader saying, “wait, what?” But when they re-read, they will realize the foreshadowing and clues were there all along. At the risk of spoilers, I will refrain from delving too deep. I will say I had the feeling that something was off with the character in question. I just thought it was going to go in a slightly different direction.

The one character I struggled with was actually the love interest, Jonas. I felt at times his reactions were incongruent to the scenes. That being said it might be due to the plot line/suspense Dawn was trying to keep going in the story. Once again, at the risk of spoilers, I will refrain from going into detail.

Overall, this was a fantastic story that had me on the edge of my seat. I can’t wait to see where Dawn takes us next with her writing.

Thanks for reading! My next review will be of Hanson Oak’s They Came from the Sea, they Went to the Stars, part of the Dark Tides Anthology. I will doing a few more blogs on my fall trip to Dawson City, and our next years projects for the cabin in Chicken.

The Sourtoe Cocktail

More of my adventures in Dawson City, YT as I researched my Historical Fiction Novel, A Drink of Darkness

“You can drink it fast. You can drink it slow,

But your lips must touch the toe.” -The Sourtoe Cocktail Oath

I did a poll a while back about which blog posts people wanted to see. While the Sternwheel Graveyard won the poll to go first, I did promise to circle back around to the Sourtoe Cocktail.

The Sign for the Sourtoe Cocktail club. Yes, that many people have imbibed. I was #91346

What’s the Sourtoe Cocktail?

A tourist attraction in Dawson is to join the Sourtoe Cocktail Club. It is even in the Yukon, Larger Than Life, tourist pamphlet. What is the Sourtoe Cocktail, though? It is quite simple, but yet kind of gross. It is a shot of alcohol (must be more than 40% by volume—no beer or wine) with a toe in it.

It is an actual human toe preserved in salt.

How the hell did they come up with this idea?

Captain Dick Stevenson came up with the idea in 1973 when he found the preserved toe of Louie Linken. The rum-runner lost the toe to frostbite in the 1920’s.

Did I join the Sourtoe Club?

So at first I was resolutely in the no category. But my husband wore me down in the week or so leading up to our trip—you know, the whole when in Rome idea. We were staying at a B&B just down the street from the Sourtoe Saloon, so we figured we’d just saunter down, do the shot and go home. They don’t start up until 9pm. Much to our surprise, there was already a huge crowd. We watched people down the shot for a while, then decided to come back early the next day and get our spot in the queue.

The next day, I got a call from my boss letting me know our business unit was being sold, so I was going to be laid off at the end of the year. Primed for a few good drinks, I headed to the Saloon ready to join the club.

You pay for your shot of choice in advance. I decided on Jameson Irish Whiskey. When you sit down across from the Good Captain, he fills out your Sourtoe Membership certificate. You have to agree that you will not swallow, bite, or purposefully put the toe in your mouth at the risk of a $2500 fine.

The current toe used in the Sourtoe Cocktail. It is NOT the original toe.They are on #10 after the alst one was stolen.

Yes, if you are wondering—the toe has been swallowed more than once. Last time on purpose. The toe I had the—uh—pleasure of imbibing is not the original toe. They are actually on their 10th or so toe in this game.

The toe looks more like a small shriveled sausage than a toe. I took the oath from the Captain and became the 91346-th member of the Sourtoe Cocktail Club. If you are interested, you’ll be happy to know that you only have to pay the fee one time. After that if you want to do it again, you can just show your certificate and the fee is waived.

Me with my certificate proclaiming me to be a proud member of the Sourtoe Cocktail Club

Wait—people want to do this MORE THAN ONCE?

Once was good enough for me. Apparently, the record is 14 times—in one night. One of the times the toe was swallowed was when a guy was trying to beat the record.

Overall it was a fun experience. After Ray and I joined the club, we sat around joking and heckling others. The atmosphere draws a light-hearted tourist crowd, and everyone joins in on the fun. If you’re interested in joining the club, the Sourdough Saloon is in the downtown hotel on the corner of 2nd and Queen St. As previously mentioned, they start promptly at 9, but I would recommend getting there early and getting your shot ready (maybe have a few before hand to build up your courage).

Me posing with the Captain at the Sourdough Saloon.

Thanks for reading. My Alaska horror novella, The Dark Land is now available on Amazon. Subscribe to my newsletter below and get a sneak peak of The Dark Land.


Lured by her high peaks and vast forests, adventurers swarm to the siren call of Alaska’s backcountry. Her harsh bite scars many. Some never return.

The legend of the Headless Ravine is steeped in blood. Its hunger for human flesh never sleeps, even in the deepest cold of winter…

In the meantime stay tuned for more of our adventures in Dawson and the interior of Alaska.

Gold nugget from Jack Wade Gold Co. Guess how many oz this weighs

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The Red Baron

Stories from the dating trenches…literally

I’ve been married now for 10 years. I still have vivid memories of the dating scene and of course, my strangest dates. I promised some of my followers I would do a blog post about one of the weirdest after we had a lively Twitter debate about dating deal breakers. So here it is, the full story on The Red Baron. I’ll give him a pseudonym of Mr. Baron for this blog post.

Date #1

As some of you know, I am a huge fan of history. In fact, I am even writing a historical fiction novel at the moment. It’s set in Dawson City in 1898. So, on my first date with Mr. Baron, I was pleased to fall into a deep conversation about WWI history and of course the man known as Baron Manfred von Richthofen.

https://www.history.com/topics/world-war-i/manfred-baron-von-richthofen

Now, Mr. Baron seemed like a half-way decent guy. REALLY knowledgeable about the Red Baron and his WWI flying history. In fact, I can’t remember talking about ANYTHING else on the date. To be honest, I don’t think he really asked me anything about myself. That being said, his knowledge of history had me impressed. Mr. Baron was a little odd, but so am I.

I figured I would give him a second date.

Date #2

On our second date, he spent most of it telling me about how he travelled to Europe to visit where the Red Baron was born in Poland, where he had trained to fly and where he had ultimately crashed and died in Vaux-sur-Somme, France. I was beginning to find his obsession with the Red Baron to be a little over the top.

Then I also thought, meh, we all have our thing.

I love Louisa May Alcott. When I went to Massachusetts in 2018 to graduate from my master’s program from WPI, we made a special trip to Concord, MA. We stopped at Orchard House. We even went to the Sleepy Hollow Cemetery and visited Louisa May Alcott’s grave. I did a whole blog post about the visit. So, I told myself:

Who am I to be so judgy?

Orchard House, Concord, MA
Gravestone of Louisa May Alcott, Sleepy Hollow Cemetery, Concord, MA

Date #3

His Apartment-BIG RED FLAGS

On date number three we went for a hike near his apartment, then he invited me in.

Once again, he had other proclivities and mannerisms that gave me an odd vibe. I tempered it with the argument that he seemed like a nice, normal guy who was just REALLY into history.

I should mention not only was he into WWI history, but pretty much the whole era of the early 1900’s. Including the history of the sinking of the Titanic.

Walking into his apartment he had a full, wall-sized poster from the movie, Titanic. Staring at me from its very own glass case was Rose, from Titanic.

Yes folks, he had his very own KATE WINSLET DOLL!!!

https://www.ebay.com/itm/FRANKLIN-MINT-TITANIC-KATE-WINSLET-AS-ROSE-RED-JUMP-DRESS-16-VINYL-DOLL-NEW-COA-/252622847372

The creepy vibes were overpowering as his doll watched our every move. He told me more about the Red Baron and his obsession with the Titanic as he tried to put his best moves on me. I made a polite excuse about needing to work the next day and bailed.

Final Phone call-Hailing the Spirit World

Mr. Baron called me later that week to chat. He proceeded to tell me all about how sometimes, he gets a medium to channel the Red Baron for him, so that he can know more about the Red Baron’s personality and traits so he can be more like him.

Look, I have nothing against seeking spiritual or professional guidance in your life. But damn. I think even Manfred von Richthofen has to be watching from the ether thinking, the same thing I was,

“GET A LIFE OF YOUR OWN!”

My brain was still stewing over his spiritual revelation when he asked his next question:

“So, what do you think your timeline is for when you’ll have sex with me?”

-The Red Baron

No, I hadn’t bedded Mr. Baron. My Spidey senses screamed NO on this one.

Now they were absolutely howling.

In my head I replied NEVER. I was starting to have visions of him asking me to cosplay as Rose from Titanic.

As I write this, my husband is all for re-creating the “drawing scene with the necklace,”—but I digress.

Over the phone, I politely told him I would have sex with him when I was comfortable and felt it was the right time.

You’re going to be shocked—he never called again. Guess the feeling was mutual.

The Best Comebacks

So relating this story a few weeks later to a friend and her boyfriend over beers at our favorite pub, and I get to the end. Her boyfriend chokes on his beer and starts to laugh.

“What?” I asked.

“OMG! You know what you should have told him?”

“No? What?”

“I only sleep with Real Barons.”

Why do the best comebacks always come to you when it is too late?

Thanks for reading friends. For my single friends, hang in there. I know it’s tough. In the meantime, I do promise to spill the secrets on some of my weird dating adventures (weirder than that?). Meanwhile stay tuned for more Alaska stories and reviews of great books. My own self-published horror novels, the Dark Land, and The Devil’s Valley are available on Amazon.

The legend of Alaska’s Headless Ravine is steeped in Blood. It’s hunger for human flesh never sleeps, even in the deepest cold of winter. Skill, courage and love will be pushed to the limits on the isolated boundaries of The Dark Land.
Me at the Sternwheel Graveyard outside of Dawson City, doing research for my Gothic Horror set during the Klondike Goldrush

My Review of Michael Nadeau’s The Darkness Returns

Fantasy is one of my favorite genres to read. By definition magical elements impossible to the regular world are necessary to the plot. There aFre various subgenres within the standard fantasy genre. Michael Nadeau’s The Darkness Returns falls into the category of High Fantasy. In this sub-genre, the story is set in a world of the authors creation, usually a medieval but magical world. At the same time the plot is carried by a hero’s quest. In my review I will explore how Michael not only creates his magical world of Lythinall, but follows or in some cases turns the standard archetypes on their heads to build his story.

Archetypes and the Hero’s Quest

It is impossible to discuss the high fantasy genre without defining the standard archetypes associated with the genre.

http://www.soulcraft.co/essays/the_12_common_archetypes.html

What I really enjoyed about Michael’s story is that while he does employ some of the basic archetypes, he twists them in such a way so that they are fresh. We are not stuck with the tired, old valiant heroes, virgin princess, ancient seer, etc. I will explore these in more depth when I get into the characters.

Motivations and Themes of the Hero’s Quest

Then there are four motivations that drive our hero forward according to the traditional Hero’s quest. Some call them the orientations. They are common to certain archetypes over others. I would argue they also motivate the antagonist as well. Michael does a good job of using one or more of these themes for each of his characters to drive his story forward.

  • Ego
  • Order
  • Social
  • Freedom

In all stories these four themes are at the heart of what drive a character’s actions according to Jung and Campbell. They are particularly important to the genre of High Fantasy.

Storyline

From the very beginning Michael sets a good pace to the story, starting us out first in the head of the villain as he awakens and claws his way out of the ground. He then moves through the land of Lythinall, on a path of destruction. He literally decays all he comes into contact with. Michael maintains the pace throughout, while dropping hints of previous stories where the minor characters (in this book) had quests with one another.

Characters

Dar’Krist

His villain was possibly the most well written character of all the characters of the story. As he moves through the story bent on destruction his attitude and personality reminded me of Randall Flagg, “The Walking Dude” from Stephen King’s the Stand. So as not to include any spoilers from Michael’s story, I won’t give away his supernatural origins. Dar’Krist has broken free of his containment and is loose. He is a destructive force and is now bent on revenge for being so confined. Michael plays on all 4 of the above motivations with this character. I would say the biggest is Ego. Which also becomes this character’s fatal flaw. He is so sure he is unstoppable that he misses vital clues when he charges into a fight.

Allissanna

One thing that the fantasy world gets a bad rap for is sexism and objectification of its female characters. Either subjugating them to a damsel in distress role, over the top sexualization, or creating harsh female “butch” characters. Michael on the other hand, has created a relatable and believable character in the Princess Allissanna. He neither saddles us with a frail damsel or a Mary Sue. With Allissanna, Michael is combining both the princess/maiden and the hero/warrior archetype into one character. Ego and Social standing play a huge part in this Allissanna’s development. Both her mother and father (the King and Queen) were legendary warriors so she wants to show that she is just as capable and more than just a princess. Her desire to prove herself, and her youth lead her to make mistakes that almost get her killed on several occasions. As she and Rhoe travel through Lythinall fighting both fighting Dar’Krist and trying to get back to Castle Everknight, she begins to mature.

Rhoe

Part of the Hero’s Quest is also a sense of magical destiny. To some extent it involves Allissanna, but from the very start of the story, when Rhoe has a vision of Dar’Krist’s approach, we know that Rhoe is something out of the ordinary. He embodies three characters rolled into one: the hero archetype and to some extent, the magician and the innocent. While he and Allissanna end up on the quest together, there is a lot of foreshadowing that the ultimate climax and showdown is going to be between Rhoe and Dar’Krist. Michael does a good job of building up the mystery of Rhoe’s magical capabilities and origins, leaving the reader wanting to know more

I enjoyed the romance between Rhoe and Allissanna. Michael doesn’t try to sell us on some tired trope of having them start out hating each other or something silly like that. Instead he shows us two young people who are attracted to each other but don’t quite know how to express it at first. Their awkwardness is realistic and endearing. By the end of the Darkness Returns, they have confessed their mutual feelings for one another. I get the sense that it will be the reality of their social standings and possibly the origins of Rhoe’s magic that creates conflict in their relationship as the story progresses.

Karsis the Bard

Karsis is definitely a unique character. He can be any archetype at any given point in the story, as he tends to morph to what the other characters need at the time. His character is very fluid and dynamic. To Rhoe and Allisanna is he a mentor and sage. Though predominantly, he is the jester/explorer travelling throughout the land of Lythinall singing songs and combatting evil. Like Rhoe, we get hints of his magical past.

Side Characters

Michael creates and intriguing cast of side characters. At the risk of spoilers for what I hope will be the rest of his series, I will leave off going into detail here, but we get a sense of previous adventures with Karsis, Carana the Warrior, the King and Queen of Everknight, and many others.

Telling

There were times in the story that I felt there could be more showing and less telling. Some of the scenes felt a little compressed with a lot of side information and subplots (which I would expect from a good fantasy novel). I wanted to see more build-up between the characters in certain high-intensity scenes (especially the scene between Carana and Karsis). At the same time, Michael does a good job of keeping a steady pace, so more showing might have sacrificed the momentum he sets from the beginning of the story. He also keeps this story to a length that is digestible for a first novel. It gets the reader invested in the world and characters, but without dragging it out too much. Michael does a great job of leaving the reader wanting more.

I really enjoyed my journey through Michael’s world of Lythinall. I can’t wait to see where he takes us next and how our young heroes Allissanna and Rhoe will deal with Dar’Krist.

The Dark Land, horror novella by DM Shepard
The Dark Land, Available on Amazon

Thanks for reading. My horror novella, The Dark Land, is now available on Amazon. Sign up for my newsletter below to get a sneak peak.


Lured by her high peaks and vast forests, adventurers swarm to the siren call of Alaska’s backcountry. Her harsh bite scars many. Some never return…

The legend of the Headless Ravine is steeped in blood. The Dark Land’s hunger for flesh never sleeps, even in the deepest cold of winter.

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The Sternwheel Graveyard

A side-trip on our visit to Dawson as part of my research for my Historical Fiction novel, A Drink of Darkness

There were two ways to get to the Klondike goldfields during the stampede of 1898. There was the treacherous and shorter (by mileage) overland route from Skagway over the Chilkoot or White Passes, then float the Yukon River from Bennet Lake through Carmacks up to Dawson. This route took longer (4 months on average), and could only be done when the passes were open. It could also only be done by those willing and able to pack the 1000 lbs of gear necessary to cross the Canadian border. The passes were too steep for horses, so the gear had to be packed by hand. It took a person on average 40 trips to lug the gear the 33 miles over the Chilkoot to Lake Lindeman.

Avalanches were common. Once the prospectors crossed White Pass, they built boats at Bennet Lake, the headwater of the Yukon (or Lindeman if they took the Chilkoot) . According to the RCMP (Royal Canadian Mounted Police) over 7,000 boats, some of questionable seaworthiness were built and launched in the spring of 1898. But it was not smooth sailing. They faced the White Horse Rapids. Their choices were to either to shoot the rapids, or pack their gear around. After many rafts and canoes were lost in the rapids, the RCMP decreed that women could not shoot the rapids, but had to hike around. Klondike Kate (mentioned in a previous blog) is famous for having defied this order. She hopped into a raft at the last minute before they could stop her.

Klondike Kate Rockwell, Queen of the Klondike
ASL-P41-056
P. E. Larss Photograph Collection, 1898-1904.

The longer route was by steamer from Seattle to St. Michael, then by Sternwheel (Paddleboat) up the Yukon to Dawson. The total trip usually took about 8 days (4 days travel up the Yukon). But in the summer of 1898, the year my main character Helena travels to meet her husband in Dawson City, water levels were notoriously low. The boat trip up the Yukon stretched into over a week. The boats ran out of food as they slogged the 1600 miles to the “Paris of the North.” This still seems like better option compared to 4 months on the trail, but it was expensive. Not only did you still need to have the 1000lbs of gear, you had to be able to afford a ticket on the boats. They were often overcrowded, dirty, unmaintained and got stuck often in the slow, muddy Yukon River.

Stermwheeler the Keno in Dawson City, YT

They also could only run when this massive Northern River was free of ice. Break-up in the spring of 1898 (not necessarily ice-free) was May 8. The first paddlewheels did not get to Dawson until June. The last steamer out with a load of gold was mid-September. Freeze-up was October 31. This was a narrow travel window for those coming to Dawson in the pursuit of gold.

Yukon River, looking north from Midnight Dome

On our recent trip to Dawson we decided to take a tour of the Sternwheel Graveyard. We heard about it only by chance as we were researching things to do in Dawson. It is not located in Dawson City, but on the West side of the Yukon River. To get to the graveyard from Dawson, take the ferry across the river to the Yukon River campground. You’ll have to park then walk through the campground, then north along the river bank.

Approaching the Sternwheeler Graveyard from the campground from the river. The Julia B is the first sternwheeler visible.

This site by Murray Lundburg has comprehensive information about the Sternwheeler Graveyard. Murray has been visiting the site since 1990 and has complied pictures of the decay of the wreckage over the years. He has also done a great job of putting together the known history of the site. Rather than try to duplicate his work I have included his link below:

http://www.explorenorth.com/library/ships/sternwheeler_graveyard.html

You can see information about the 7 ships that were originally believed to have been abandoned at the site, along with an original picture from 1938 of the Julia B (the sternwheeler closest to the Yukon). He also includes a comprehensive list of the boats that travelled the Yukon and the dates they were believed to have been in service. For the purpose of my story, I used the Alice, as I know from references this boat brought the Sisters of St. Ann to Dawson in August of 1898 to work for Father Judge as nurses at St. Mary’s hospital.

Here our some of our photos of the graveyard in August of 2019:

View from the bank of the Yukon:

The Julia B
Julia B’s boiler. Kind of made us wonder if it was the inspiration for “The Cremation of Sam McGee,” by Robert Service.
Seattle No 3 can barely be read anymore. The letttering is almost completely weathered away.
Seattle No 3 wreckage (in color)
Seattle No 3 (in black and white..just for fun)
Hull of unknown sternwheeler slightly upriver of the 3 main boats
Remnants of the paddlewheel of the Schwatka, slowly being taken over by the forest.
Julia B’s paddlewheel rotor, wooden paddles completely gone.

If you are heading to Dawson and would like a unique activity, I would highly recommend this excursion. As you can tell from these pictures, this is a hazardous location with unstable structures. If you chose to venture forth, please do not enter or climb onto any of the wreckage or take “souvenirs.” Sturdy hiking boots are highly recommended.

Me standing with the paddlewheel of the Schwatka
The Dark Land, horror novella by DM Shepard
The Dark Land, Available on Amazon

Thanks for reading. My horror novella, the Dark Land is available on Amazon


The legend of the Headless Ravine is steeped in blood. The Dark Land’s hunger for human flesh never sleeps, even in the deepest cold of winter

Sign up for my newsletter to get sneak peeks at The Dark Land, and follow my blog to hear more about my excursion to Dawson and how it relates to my historical fiction, A Drink of Darkness.

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